29-01-08

what really happens when two men face each other at gunpoint ?

do they really think about anything at all when they look throught this narrow tunnel ?

the domino effect ?

family

wife

child

man

brother

the cause

the worth of it all

the powers

the manipulation

the insignifiance

does the train of thought go clickety click ?

faces ?

moments of a past life ?

impressions ?

smells ?

tastes ?

they say that your life falshes in your mind before you die

as you want to hold onto all that you cherish the most

memories

the past

whereas you spend your time thinking 

of what your life could be

could have been

would be

hold the trigger

breathe

27-01-08

sunday

confession

being in love

nothing matters

reduced to a barely respectable 

magma of neuronic chemistry

you watch the world go round

you wait

you hope

you despair

you aggravate

nervous ?

yes

of fumbling, stumbling, falling rediculously

frightened ?

yes

of losing her.

a friend told me 

"being in love is being jealous 24/7"

not jealousy, envy

not being able to be there when others are

and i'm the only one to blame

the only one

me

hurts my pride

yes, envy,

more, and more,

pure greed, never satisfied, never happy,

mine, my selfish mine,

asking for more, dragging it out from even deeper,

eat all you can just is not enough

this insatiable gluttony riding on over drive

knows no limits

and you wait

i wait

I sloth

meandering king of patience, annihalator of boredem,

mastermind of the next faulty move

the next faux pas

i look for signs that mean nothing 

but reasure me in the most trivial of ways

and pave my way into some sort of sanity.

beautiful sin

beautiful toxin

lust, all in our mind, creeping deeper and deeper in our minds 

frustration growing thus creating a violent anger screaming silently

into a dark void

toxic sin

25-01-08

read this cross interview yesterday about bull fighting. 

two afficionados gloryfying the art, explaining with such ease

how it was noble and beautiful to fight bulls.

just by using the word humain, 

and associating it 

with 

the 

act 

of 

killing 

made the whole conversation so surreal.

i can understand the beauty of the art, 

but why does the bull have to die ?

the torero was saying that in all his years 

of fighting, 

and killing

he had never seen pain in the eyes of a bull.

(excuse my poor humour)

it's a load of bullshit if i've ever seen any

24-01-08

ITV Sample from dan dennett on Vimeo.

Football, the ONE true religion in this world.

So much love, so much passion, so much anger,

so many true feelings, united in one arena for 90 minutes.

it's awesome how the energy generated by the sport 

captivates so many people around the world at the same time.

Kids wear the same Ronaldo shirts in Shanghai, Paris or Mexico...

You want spiritu sante ? watch football

none if that "i'll go to mass on sunday and redeem my sins"

your team wins you're happy, it looses : FUCK and full stop.

Spurs beat Arsenal and THAT, is heaven.

21-01-08

Pix galore today

Fashion

Portraits

Travels

20-01-08

A Madras is a cocktail named most probrably after the having witnessed too many sunsets on the Indian coast...

It's composed of lots of vodka, orange juice and a splash of cranberry juice.

Does one ever get bored of sunsets ?

Venice Beach

sunset

jealous ?

yep ! 

you bet i am.

16-01-08

Are we goldfish ?

i guess that like us, it all depends on who shares your aquarium,

on how big your aquarium is, on how clean it is, 

on the different distractions you have in it,

the view you have out of it,

the food you eat, the cleansiness of the water you drink,

the amount of exercise you do,

and on how dreaming of the outside world keeps you going.

Yes, we are all goldfish

10-01-08

Cornelia Parker.

i discovered her work last night and find it amazing.

above : Cold Dark Matter : An exploded view.

i so relate to it

awesome

09-01-08

happy

H is for happy

A is for 'appy

P is for p

Y is for why is it so easy to be happy but so fucking hard to achieve happiness

07-01-08

so here we are, 

the new year

so how does it feel ?

the same as we left the last one ?

better ?

how about same time last year ?

how was that ?

how did it end ?

actually ever since i don't know when,

on new year's eve i always set myself 

a stupid bet...

if i drive home safely despite the three bottles of wine in my blood,

it'll be a great year kind of bet...

it worked on several occasions

so i'm kind of hooked on to this silly superstitious act

so let it be known that 2008 SHOULD/WILL be

one hell of a fucking great year

i wish myself nothing 

but to get through this one with as little scars as possible

and to you

dear reader, 

what do i wish you?

peace

love

always

love